But I understand that you want to make your father happy.. Its ok sayang. Its ok to want to make him happy. But remember, you need to make yourself happy first. I know that you are always wanting to find his approval, because of so many reasons. He left us not because of us. He left us because of him. Please remember he still loves you no matter what. I wish I could make things alright for you.
These past few weeks, I have been trying to get him to change your school. Iman starts Primary One next year and I'm taking this opportunity to look into schools that provide the International syllabus and also Islamic schools. I wrote your father a long email saying I'm worried that your current school (APSS) puts too much unnecessary pressure on academic performance - and this puts too much pressure on you. Ive seen you struggle with homework and end up in tears one too many times. I am worried that the pressure will affect you in other ways. I had depression when I was a teenager because of this pressure - always having to be the best at everything. This pressure was imposed on me by myself, but also because my parents wanted me to be the best, and also pressure from school, and also because I changed schools alot.
I really don't want you to fall into depression like I did. I want to save you from it. That's why I think homeschooling is the best thing for both of you. There's no pressure, and you learn whatever you want at your own pace. You can still prepare for exams IGCSE for example and still go to university and get a good job. This makes most sense for you Sarah, especially because you take alot of burden onto yourself.
So I emailed your father and told him my concerns. I don't know yet what he will decide.
I will do my best to protect you from that disease ya Sarah and Iman. Mama loves you. Always remember Allah wills everything to happen. So whatever happens, happened, is because Allah allowed it to happen. and HE is the best to help us through it.